13 February 2027
Saturday. Valentine’s weekend, and tonight’s appointments were all couples. Couples counselling! At last! I have always wanted to try it.
Two is the smallest group I see, and I adore a pair. With four patients, somebody can always hide behind somebody else. With two, there is nowhere to hide. Each one has to trust the other in the dark, and I get to listen to them doing it.
Session notes, couple one: argued about who heard the noise first. Resolved it by holding hands. Couple two: one did all the talking, the other did all the thinking, and they swapped halfway, which I have never seen before. Couple three: proposed. In my cell. I am not making this up.
I did not interrupt the proposal. I am a professional. I simply turned the lights down a little lower, for ambience, and when she said yes I very nearly said hellooo out of sheer joy.
Every session in my practice is private, of course. The only people in the cell are the ones you came with. Plus me. I am always there. That is the romantic part.
— Your Therapist
